Recently I went to buy some new plants at the garden centre for our angel – Lily . We’ve brought a ones before many times but these were special ones to go in some new plant pots in the back garden and in my mind I thought
” ooo definitely girly colours! ” I was so enjoying picking them out knowing they were for my darling! For it was speaking to my heart.
Now I’m no green fingers and certainly not the greatest at growing things but I don’t care – these were so meaningful I knew they were already going to be planted and grown with love and that’s what mattered! Well that and with my fingers crossed, hopefully they would live long enough for us to enjoy them for a while and take in their beauty just as she is our beautiful girl!
There’s been alot happening lately so the plants aren’t just PLANTS – they do mean alot and we have plans to eventually do her a special area in the garden and so much more, but we just haven’t got there properly yet – but it will come! We have to give ourselves time and patience.
So I picked them excitedly and felt happy – it wasn’t sad, depressing, emotional or too hard to bare. Nothing awful or bad here. It was lovely, it made me feel good and warm. In fact if the other shoppers looked at me carefully I was probably the happiest one there!!! For things that are for my angel do make me smile and feel proud. It’s not always all doom and gloom or negativity as people may assume. I work much harder to see the things that do give me joy since Lily and she’s taught me that it’s often in the simple little things in life. Never would I have thought I could find such joy in a garden centre – it’s really not me! But here in this moment doing this task for her – I can honestly say I feel even more like her mummy, for its our job as her parents to make and do beautiful things for her! Plus it’s so nice I’m gonna grasp this positivity with both hands right now. Especially as we all know that hard days can just only be round a corner!
The things we do for our angels mean so much no matter what they are and yes sometimes they can be tough and can take their toll on us. Some do create sad emotions but it’s not always the case! There’s room for so much more in our hearts and if we only felt the bad we wouldn’t survive!
As humans we all need to experience both positive and negative emotions in order to do everything really if you think about it – how would anyone ever cope never ever smiling again? It’s honestly no different for bereaved parents! It fact it’s just even more vital to our SURVIVAL.
Well going back to the flowers… I got carried away and brought way more than I planned to . Every single one in gorgeous pretty girl colours almost smiling at me! I packed the car up like someone who’s just recieved excellent news . But it was just the excitement really!
I love her to the moon and back and if I could give her the moon I would but here in these plants is that immense love! And with right conditions and her watching over them, they will bloom and grow and Lily will clap from the clouds!
No – not every task is sad – some are totally the opposite!! Plus there’s nothing more beautiful than something that’s done with love in memory of your angel. It takes strength to do these things but they do come with rewards too.
I hope this post inspires even just 1 person out there! And I hope it educates society a little too!
Whatever your next ” happy task ” is for your angel – grab it with both hands. I see the love inside your heart!
Written by Penny ( Lily’s Mummy )
Always and forever my darling xxx