La Festa di San Martino

The celebration of Saint Martin’s day is a special Venetian tradition. On the 11th of November the children in Venice, Italy stroll from one square to another, passing through the streets, the calle – as the are called in Venice-, armed with dishes and lids, and ask for some coins or sweets from the shopkeepers and passers-by, while the keep singing a nursery rhyme in Venetian dialect, and they also have the proper answer depending on whether they have been given some treats or not. With the money they have received they can buy the traditional St. Martin’s cakes, which form the saint on horseback, fully armed (decorated with all sorts of sweets 🙂 ).

You may ask why I am telling you about this. Until 5 years ago I had had no idea about this traditional celebration, nor about the cakes. But on the 11th, Nov. 2010 I went to Venice because that would have been my due date and from the very beginning of my pregnancy I longed to be able to go to Venice and to show this beloved city to my sweet little child. So it seemed quite proper that I would go and stroll along the streets and would show it to my angel, if it was not possible in any other way. I had clear plans for that day. Leaving the station I followed Strada Nova, where you find lots of shops and cafés, towards Rialto and then San Marco, and from there I took a different route back to the railway station, actually I took the vaporetto along Canal Grande. Along the way I had a mental conversation with my baby boy, I told him why I wanted to show him one particular place or another, why they meant so much for me. It was a beautiful day, even if a sad one.

When I reached the first bridge over the canals I could see a whole bunch of small children walking with their kindergarten teachers, all dressed up and holding some bags or dishes, singing loudly. I was wondering what they were doing but it was only when I returned home that I could find out the details of this particular Venetian tradition. I also saw the cakes in the shop windows, one more beautiful and colourful than the other. It was fascinating. This unexpected and heart-warming event had a great impact on my day. This was a brand new experience, even after so many visits to Venice, and I felt amused and heartbroken at the same time. I liked the long line of the children, holding hands and having fun, however, I was very well aware of the fact that my little son could never take part in anything like that. Having seen all this, it took me some time to go on. But I kept on with the mental conversation and Venice looked even more magnificient than ever before, I believe.

Still in Strada Nova I bought some tulips, white ones. When I reached San Marco Square, I went out to the sea. I stopped by the gondola stands and I threw all the flowers in the water, one after the other.

La Festa

People may have looked at me wondering what I was doing but I paid no attention to anyone, I could not see anything through my tears. I keep watching the tulips in the water for a long time and suddenly I felt utterly alone and very sad. The day, that special day which was supposed to be my child’s birthday was about to end. All my energy was gone, I was there with my soul and my heart aching.

Each year ever since this day has been a very special one and it will always be so. I arrange things so that I can have some time to remember. There are no birthday cakes, no candles or presents, but the 11th November is a day that I shall never forget. This is the sixth one this year. I am going to spend it in Venice, I guess.

Éva Zsák
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Éva Zsák is 39. She lives in Hungary and Italy. She is a teacher and an interpreter, but now also a medical school student. Her little angel, Peter is her only child. He died five years ago due to a premature rupture of membranes. This experience changed her life completely. She started to learn about grief and child-loss and the importance of the human factor in doctor-patient relationships. She likes reading, poetry, and literature in general.

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