Talk to Us Tuesday

Talk to us Tuesday white flowers

Happy Tuesday everyone! We’re starting a new weekly feature this week, called Talk to us Tuesday. We want to know what being a Still Mother is like for YOU. Each week we’ll ask you to share with us. Look for a new topic, every Tuesday!

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This week we’re asking you to tell us your baby’s name and/or nickname and how you chose it. Does it have a special meaning? Is it a family name?

If your baby was unnamed – did you have a name you wanted to use? Or a special nickname?

Please comment below and get the conversation going. We want to get to know all of you <3

Lisa Sissons
Latest posts by Lisa Sissons (see all)

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Lisa Sissons is mother to Finley Arthur Sissons, who was born and died in Naples, Italy at 3 days old in 2012. Finley was diagnosed with a very severe case of Hypoxic Ischemic Encephalopathy, after enduring a lengthy period without oxygen during labour and after his birth. After years of investigation, it was determined that Finley's death was caused by many counts of medical negligence by the military hospital where he was born. Lisa found it to be incredibly important to hold the hospital and medical staff responsible for their actions, and Lisa and her husband were offered a wrongful death settlement from the United States government for the death of their son. They hope that by holding the hospital legally accountable, that it will prevent other babies from dying in a similarly needless way. Lisa is just a normal girl trying to help her son's memory live on by writing honestly and openly about life, love and loss. She is co-founder and web designer at Still Mothers, blogs at The Stars Apart (formerly Dear Finley) about all things life and babyloss, and has also written articles for Still Standing Magazine and Circle of Moms. Lisa lives in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada with her husband Steve and their cheeky dog, a Staffordshire Bull Terrier called Jacob. She tries to find meaning in life by pursuing her many hobbies and interests, which include photography, crafting and web design.

59 thoughts on “Talk to Us Tuesday”

  1. We had a long list of possible girls names but it took us forever to agree on a boys name. He was born premature, and we hadn’t been sure he would survive. He cried when he was born, and we were so relieved. We named him Cole, the name we both loved so much. He lived for 5.5 months.

  2. Our son was born on November 23, 2011 and died shortly after from prune belly syndrome and posterior urethral valves. His name was Levi Dale. We also had a loss at 13 weeks and although not named, I have always referred to this baby as “Owen” since that’s part of our last name.

    1. Hi Chris,

      Occasionally comments go into our filter for approval. It seems random. Yours did so it just needed to be manually approved. It just means we need to approve it on our end before it will show publicly.

  3. My only child was born early at 21 weeks gestation. We called him Desmond after his daddy. I had been adamant that if it was a boy there was no way he was going to be called Desmond as I didn’t like the name but when he was born I had no choice but call him Desmond as he was a carbon copy of his daddy and it is now my favourite name.

  4. My husband chose the name Brynlee but apparently with the excitement of so many names I brushed it off. Eventually I found it and fell in love, so we knew it was the name. We chose Grace as the middle name because she was given to us by God’s grace. My Brynlee Grace was the most perfect beautiful blessing.

  5. Paul N. Englert, Jr. was named after his dad. We had only 19 short years with him when he passed away from a pulmonary embolism on September 19, 2013. He was our only child.

  6. My twin boys were born on January 12 of this year and passed away later that day. We had made lists of names for boys and girls since they couldn’t tell on the ultrasounds due to lack of fluid. But we hadn’t decided on any yet when I went into labor. I think we kept hoping we didn’t need to since it was too early to have much hope. When they were in utero, we called them Apple (Twin A) and Bean (Twin B), based on what they called twins in utero in a book I love. We ended up naming them the next day, Owen and Benjamin. It was weird to name them after they had died, but we definitely wanted them to have names.

    1. I think it’s very special that you named them after they died. It shows how much you love and care for them. We’re so sorry about your precious children. I will be thinking of Owen and Benjamin.

  7. We miscarried at 11 weeks the first time we got pregnant. We had nicknamed the baby Peach. For our next pregnancy she had a name as soon as we knew she would be a daughter, Stella May. I had picked Stella years prior and luckily it was loved by my husband too. It was the first name of my great grandmother. We picked May for my husband’s family as it is his mom’s middle name. People in the NICU loved her name. We miss them both everyday.

    1. I love the name Stella May. Very classic and very beautiful. And also Peach is such a sweet nickname. Thank you for sharing here. I will keep y our precious babies in my heart <3

  8. Since we did not know the gender of either of our babies, we have “saved” the names of Carter Liam and Kaarin Rose for them. We wanted to name our children with names that started with the “K” sound. The first names had no special meaning other than we really liked them, but their middle names were in honor of my husband’s grandfather and my grandmother. When we adopted kids, they were older, so we did not change their first names. I found it difficult to never have the experience of being able to name a child on a birth certificate and share the story of our child’s names. Thank you for asking!

    1. I’m so glad that you are able to share the names you saved for the precious babies you lost. We will hold space for Carter Liam and Kaarin Rose. Thinking of you Jen and thanks for sharing with us <3

  9. Jillian Harper Foster was born at 21w4d on April 2, 2014. Both my husband and I have names that start with J so we knew she needed a J name. We also wanted her to have my initials, and I love the names Jillian and Harper. We agreed on her name long before we found out we were having a girl and it is the perfect name for our sweet girl.

    We also have a baby J – as I suffered from an ectopic pregnancy and will never know the sex of our second baby.

  10. My son was stillborn at 28 weeks on 01/04/2015. We named him Charles Michael Rendulic. Charles is after my father-in-law first name and Michael after my father’s first name.

  11. Addison River Rusch or just “Addy”. I loved the name Addison. I had it picked out when we were just talking about having a family and my husband was easy to convince. Her middle name, River, didn’t come till my 2nd trimester. My husband had been joking about names that would make a good pun with our last name, Rusch, which sounds like rush. River Rusch was one he came up with as a joke but I loved it. I then spent almost the rest of my pregnancy trying to convince him it was the perfect middle name. I figured that if she ever needed a famous screen name, she could be River Rusch and be very memorable.

  12. our son Oliver was born still last august at just shy of 42 weeks. we didn’t know the sex but were so sure it was going to be a girl. on my due date, we still had no boy name picked out, so it turned into my family calling out names for about an hour at my dad’s birthday party. lol. the one that stuck with me was Oliver, but i was still convinced that we’d never have to use it.
    when i was preparing to push his body into the world, i asked my boyfriend if we could use Oliver, just in case. his full name is Oliver William Love, my owl. he is my wise buddha-baby, an enlightened one. and an offering of peace (the olive branch) who brought so many relationships closer together, including his dad and me.

    1. I really love the name Oliver, and I can just imagine how sweet it was when you asked your husband if you could use the name, just in case. Those special moments are the ones that will always stand out. Thinking of you Allison <3

  13. We lost our beautiful girl 20/01/2014 stillborn at 25 weeks. We named her Chloe. It was a name i really liked right from the beginning of my pregnancy and we thought she deserved the name i wanted for her even though she became and angel. We never gave her a middle name we had no idea for that and felt that the one name Chloe was special enough for her.

    1. I think it’s wonderful that you had enough love to give her the name that you truly loved. Chloe is a beautiful name, and I will be thinking of your beautiful daughter. Thanks for sharing <3

  14. I have my baby girl I named Remy Simone, I lost her on March 6, 2014 at 18+3 due to placental abruption.
    I also have my sweet baby boy who was born sleeping on May 4,2015 at 19+1. I pPROMmed at 18+3, and delivered just 4 1/2 days later.
    I also have 7 pregnancy losses prior to these, they were all very early. I call them my butterflies.

    1. Hi Jessica, It always breaks my heart a little bit extra to hear of mamas who have lost more than one child. I’ll be thinking of Remy, your son and your sweet butterflies today. Thanks for sharing <3

  15. Our daughter was born still on March 30, 2015. She died at 41+1 weeks gestation due to clotting and a failed placenta. Her name is Elliot Kathryn. We loved the name Elliot and it is very close to my mother-in-law’s name, Elinor. We call my MIL Ellie and thought it would be sweet to give Elliot the same nickname. My husband’s 20 year old cousin, Kathryn, died in a car accident several years ago. We wanted to honor her by using her name. Little did we know, our daughter would also die tragically and way too soon.

    1. Thank you for sharing with us Lori. Elliot Kathryn is a beautiful name, and I’m sure that it meant a lot to Kathryn’s mother that you honoured her by using her name. I’m sure that there is a special bond between your families, with both of your precious children who died too soon <3

  16. Our son’s name was Gabriel Ethan.. Me and my husband just loved the name Gabriel when he was born at 35 weeks (Jan 30, 2015) stillborn he looked like an angel and the name Gabriel is just so fitting 🙂 praying for you other mama’s everyday that God will give us all peace and comfort each day what a hard journey this is to walk!

  17. We named our baby Ella Kathleen, Ella Kate for short. Ella is my husbands great great grandmothers name and Kathleen is my mothers name. She passed away unexpectedly 10 days after her birth. She was born at 28 weeks due to iugr and I had hellp syndrome. I miss her so much.

    1. I love the name you chose for your sweet baby, Brooke. Using family names is such a beautiful tribute to the family we love. I’m so sorry that Ella isn’t here in your arms where she should be <3

  18. My son’s name is Kayden. I always call him Kayden Baby for his nickname. He was born and gained his wings on 4/13/15. I miss him so much it hurts. Last night I had a nightmare about him. I don’t remember much but just remember I was crying and woke up with my heart jumping out of my chest. My anxiety hasn’t been so good today because of this. I am doing the march for babies in honor of him. If you would like to donate please go to http://www.marchforbabies.org/kaydens_army.

    1. I’m thinking of you Kelsey. The nightmares are so bad. When they seem so real that your entire day is marred by what you experience in your sleep. I will be thinking of you and of Kayden. And I think it’s wonderful that you are doing something in his honour that will help other families in the future <3

  19. We named our first born daughter Pearl. …she was born still at 29 weeks on April 10 2006. …she was named after my husband’s Aunt….
    Our Son Ryan wss Born at 31 weeks on October 3 2008 and passed on October 7th 2008.
    Our third child we lost at 10 weeks in November 2009…we named this child Angel.

  20. My son’s name is Christopher Lee. He was born still at 35 weeks. My daughter’s name is Arianna Christine. She was born still at 28 weeks. Christopher would be 26 this July and Arianna would be 25 this December. I miss them both so so much!

    1. Beautiful names, and I’m sure that even after all this time you still love to hear your childrens’ names spoken. Thinking of you Tammy and Christopher and Arianna <3

  21. We have 5 early losses, none of which lasted long enough for us to confirm gender. All the names we’ve given were based off of ‘mother’s intuition’ of how I felt the baby might have been, silly enough sometimes on what I was craving or how severe my morning sickness was before the loss. We have had two names picked from the very beginning, one boy and one girl, and each loss is a variation of what their name would have been if they’d made it safely into our arms.

    My first loss with my first husband I named alone, and I gave him the name Justin, as it was him coming into my life that put me on the road to breaking away from my abusive ex-husband. I’m both thankful every day that God knew Justin didn’t deserve that man as his father and saved him from it, and miss him horribly.

    After I married my current husband, we tried to give our first loss a gender neutral name, Angel, though we both agree we think she was our first little girl. I’ve hung wind-chimes outside our bedroom window and every time I hear them ring I imagine it’s her little sing-song voice singing for me. ‘Every time a bell rings, and angel gets its wings.’

    Abby or Abigail, my next angel baby, means ‘father’s joy’, and I’d like to imagine she would have been a daddy’s girl. We lost her in October, just 6 days after Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, and so keeping a candle lit is how I remember my little autumn baby.

    Joy is my fourth. The name is self-explaining, but it’s so painful to say ‘we lost Joy.’ She stayed with us the longest and so I feel the pain most profoundly over her. We lost her in the spring, and I’ll always think of her when I see the flowers bloom and the weather turn warm. Pink or yellow daisies especially bring her to mind.

    Our most recent loss, which I feel deep down would have been a boy, my husband named Jeremiah, because of the verse Jeremiah 29:11; ‘For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’

    It has been incredibly hard to hold to our faith through all of this, and recently my litany has become ‘My babies never knew pain, of fear, or cold, or hunger. They will never know anything but His glory and grace. They knew my love and I held them every moment of their lives, and they make Heaven all the more beautiful for their presence.’

    I only hope they will forgive me if I named them after the wrong gender, hehe.

    1. Mandy – I am so sorry that you have had to endure loss so many times. Justin, Angel, Abigail, Joy and Jeremiah are all in my heart. And I do love that despite everything, you have a little bit of humour left in your heart, which I see by the last line of your comment. Thank you for sharing <3

  22. We named our baby Solomon, the reason why we chose it is a long but very cool story, you can read about it on my blog http://www.naehayy.wordpress.com

    The short version is that we named him after the bible verse Solomon 2:10-12, which talks about the dark times being over and spring coming in its place with better days. Before becoming pregnant I was very out of touch with my emotions and in a dark place, but finding out I was pregnant brought me into a happy place, losing him forced me to feel emotions I had suppressed before, but after time has turned me into a better person.

  23. My sons name is Jayden Peter. His nickname would have been JP like his daddy… Whose name is Jonathan Peter. I have always loved the name Jayden and if we were having a boy that would be his name. His father ended up loving it too which worked out perfectly 🙂 and of course we wanted to name him after his daddy so that’s where Peter came from 🙂

      1. Thank you Lisa. It’s real great what you are doing for all us still mothers 🙂 it feels so good to talk about my son… When most people are afraid to even bring him up.

  24. We have 4 angels 3 are unnamed and lost around 8 weeks. But our last angel born at 21 weeks 4-25-2013 we named him Edward. We had no names picked when I went into labor and he was born into heaven, so we used my husbands middle name. He was named after his strong Daddy. We miss him everyday.

  25. Our son was named Finley Arthur Sissons before he was born, and long before we ever knew he would die. Finley was interestingly the first name we ever discussed, and it stayed in our minds through the great name debate. We never managed to agree on any girl’s names, so it was lucky he ended up being a little boy.

    We found out after the meanings of the names we chose, and they couldn’t be more fitting.

    Finley – fair warrior
    Arthur – strong as a bear (also we love old British names, and King Arthur is almost as old as it gets)

    I love my little man, and I love the name we chose for him <3

  26. We lost our sweet boy on September 2, 2014 at 40+ weeks due to a placenta abruption. We named him Patrick (after my husband) Kane (my maiden name) Gaw. We did not know what we were having and could not agree on a boy name. I mentioned Patrick, but my husband wasn’t sure he wanted to do that. I had said I wanted to use my maiden name as the middle name, but he was not thrilled about it. He thought it sounded weird (he can be difficult!). When we were in the NICU with Patrick, knowing he would not make it, my husband just came out and said Patrick Kane Gaw, no questions were asked. We just knew it was perfect for him.

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